Smallville Upgrade Review

Red Kryptonite returns to Smallville

Bear with me, the signal flickered in and out a couple of times while watching the episode which meant some dialogue was garbled or not heard at all.

The episode begins with Lois Lane having snuck into a secret lab that Tess Mercer has scientists working on an ‘upgrade’ of some kind, which involves red and green kryptonite. Security however manages to catch on and before the upgrade can be aborted, a lab accident happens of course! Their test subject manages to escape and Lois ends up setting off an explosion in the lab. She outruns the fire like she’s Megan Fox and then plummets down a shaft into darkness. Speaking of Megan Fox, Brian Austin Green is there to catch Lois Lane, returning as the character of John Corben a.k.a. Metallo.

After the credits, we’re led into Lois being woken up by Clark making out with her in bed. Lois wonders a) how Clark got into the apartment and b) how the heck she got into the apartment as the last thing she remembers is the explosion. Clark sees a cut on her arm and wonders what she’s been up to, but Lois reassures him it’s nothing. They proceed to make out, so you know what means! Yep! Lois gets a phone call from the Fake Blur a.k.a. Zod and the mood is crushed.

This is the great thing about Lois and Clark dating now, at least now the tables have turned or been at the least shared with the two of them having their “Be back in a minute, gotta save the world routine”. This is how we know that these two are equals, even with superpowers in the mix.

Lois thanks the Blur for her save last night, to which Zod shrugs off as if he were responsible. He apparently was the one to send her to the lab in the first place. Lois then goes downstairs where she finds Corben himself, who says that he thought she saved him. Here Lois shows sympathy for him when she realizes he has a chip that the scientists were using to control him. Corben then tells Lois that his Kryptonite heart needs a refueling.

This is where we sort of take a detour from the DC Comics. The reason Metallo has a Kryptonite heart in the comics (aside from the fact he’d love to see Superman pumped with as much radiation as possible) is because Kryptonite serves as a permanent power source for him. Here, it’s a battery pack except in liquid form. Lois therefore floors it and takes him to get help.

Meanwhile Clark tries to figure out where Lois was last night and has Chloe track down the location. When he gets in however, he is exposed to red kryptonite gas and his persona quickly shifts. DUH-DUH-DUH!!!!

Clark promptly returns to Watchtower where he finds out that massive amounts of Kryptonite have been dug up and he thinks Tess is responsible, intending to make her pay. Chloe however confesses she is the one who is hoarding the Kryptonite, due to her fear that the Kandorians will rebel. Clark thinks that all the meteor rock has his name on it and says Chloe and Oliver have betrayed him, before burning the House of El symbol into the wall of Watchtower, declaring war on her.

Corben manages to break into Chloe’s crate full of Kryptonite and recharges while Clark goes to destroy it. He finds Corben and is nearly beaten when Zod comes in to save the day. Yeah, ZOD of all freakin people. Zod blows up the crate with Corben inside and Clark just smiles.

Clark manages to track down Zod and is furious he didn’t tell him about his powers. Wait a second, he was smiling right before the commercial! Zod defends his secrecy, reminding him that Chloe and Oliver have weapons ready to kill him while he is his only equal. Eventually Clark caves to this argument. What do the two Kryptonian buddies decide to do? Have some fun!

Huh. My thinking was inclined you know, revenge? Like the revenge you were talking about five minutes ago? Apparently not because we’re off to Seattle! Clark and Zod have a little conversation about Jor-El and Clark mentions the Fortress of Solitude. He offers to take Zod there, but before they leave, he decides to mess with weather by turning their rain into snow with his freezing breath.

Why is he doing this? Plot convenience of course!

Meanwhile, Lois finds the destroyed shipping crate Corben was in. He’s alive due to his cybernetic implants, but of course, his skin is perfectly free of burns! Instead, he’s naked! Yeah, because we just had to figure out a way to put some sexual tension into this episode, even when it's completely unnecessary. Anyway, Corben blames the Blur for the explosion and Lois tells him it couldn’t have been the Blur. They then realize they need to get Corben out of the city.

Back in the lab, Chloe finds Tess who has come to figure out what happened and they realize red Kryptonite is responsible for Clark’s behavior. They form a brief alliance together where they realize that Seattle has received a blizzard. Told you that it was plot convenience! Using satellite photos they discover that Clark and Zod are responsible because they find them on top of a building. Chloe puts the pieces together and realizes Zod has powers and figures out Tess already knew this.

See, Chloe’s logic has justification, but how does she know Clark didn’t carry Zod up to the top of the tower? The image shown of them doesn’t imply Zod has powers. He’s been able to get into Clark’s head without them before, so he might have been able to persuade him to let him talk to him. Argument aside, it's only a small leap of faith.

On the other side of town, Lois and Corben are getting ready to leave because her dad has a contact named Vale. Reference alert! Vale is the scientist who turned Corben into the Austrian accentless destructo-bot we know in the comics.

Anyway, Corben thanks Lois for the assistance and helps a lady on the bus with a bag. Of course because Tess has people everywhere (and I mean everywhere) the lady reactivates the chip and sends him heading right back for the lab he broke out of. Lois chases after him.

Up at the Fortress, Clark welcomes his “brother” Zod home. You know, since the real Zod is supposed to be like 50 years old and evil, I think the term “psychotic uncle” suits him more.

Now this is where it gets really irritating. Here we are with Clark telling Zod he’ll take him to his father and of course because Terence Stamp’s name wasn’t in the “guest appearance credits”, we get no voice of Jor-El. Of course Zod’s reasoning is “Jor-El doesn’t like me”. Silly Zod, it’s not that he doesn’t like you. It’s that you killed him, his wife and practically his whole freakin’ civilization!

Furthermore, where is the Fortress’ security system that we saw when Chloe wandered in back in the episode "Arrival?!" You know, the same security system that didn’t stop Lex Luthor from bringing the whole thing to the freakin’ ground back in Season 7! Yeah, you could argue that because Zod has powers now he could get past them, but we’ve seen that Jor-El’s had precautions for dealing with his own son if he ever went rogue!

Say, that’s kind of like…RIGHT FREAKIN’ NOW!

Well Zod bickers about Jor-El having the Kryptonian Bible called the Book of Rao and hiding it somewhere on Earth, because it contains all the knowledge in the universe and that story arc from the episode goes about as far as the end of this sentence.

So Chloe and Tess manage to wind up their tin soldier and send him to stop Clark and Zod before they do something stupid. Chloe thinks Clark headed for the Fortress so she cuts the feed off to make sure Tess doesn’t know the location. But then Lois breaks into the lab and confronts Tess, wanting to know where Corben is. Chloe manages to sedate her cousin and take her out while Tess cleans up the lab from Lois ever finding it.

Up at the Fortress, Corben materializes through what we can only assume to be through the Kawatche Caves and confronts the two Kryptonians with his Kryptonite heart. They manage to freeze Corben with their breath, but it doesn’t last long and he breaks out with his mind control chip gone. After knocking Zod aside, Corben pulls out a Kryptonite knife and tells Clark that because he’s doing this for a friend (yeah, the same "friend" who made you dance like the puppet you are) he won’t kill Clark as much as he wishes he could. Instead he tells him “sometimes you don’t know when you need to be saved”, jabs him with the green Kryptonite and therefore cancels out the red in him. Corben leaves the Fortress, Clark is cured and Zod is gone.

Corben later confronts Lois again where I can only assume he’s about to leave Metropolis. He thanks her for her help and they share a tender moment, but Lois says she has someone who she really cares about. Corben says the man is lucky and then heads off.

This is probably one of the first times we’ve seen a future Superman villain be played so sympathetically in the series, retain their dark flaws and yet still look hopeful for the future. After Toyman, Doomsday, Lex and Parasite you gotta get tired of them practically having the words “I’ll get you next time, Gadget” on the tips of their tongues. In some ways, I think it would be a more tragic and yet understandable way to leave the character as is and let fans figure out for themselves how he turns into the supervillain we know.

Clark talks to Chloe at the Watchtower where he apologizes for his actions and tells her that her Kryptonite arsenal was what saved mankind in the future. Oh yeah, you mean the same Kryptonite arsenal you let “Blast ‘Em in Half Zod” blow to kingdom come?! Good to know our future looks good, Superman! Well anyway, he goes into Chloe and Lois’ relationship, saying they’re almost like sisters and we get into him seeing Zod as the closest thing he’s had to a brother.

Didn’t Clark say almost the exact same thing about Davis Bloome? I mean not only is this one season ago, but it’s Zod’s own son! This metaphorical family seems to growing pretty quickly for one Clark considers so small!

Back at Zod’s warehouse, he and Tess are making out, once again for unexplained reasons. They’re still in partnership and she lies to him with photos that imply Clark is leading a secret rebellion within the Kandorians. Zod takes the bait and he realizes something has to be done. He takes the Kandorians to the Fortress of Solitude where once again Jor-El does NOTHING to stop them and Zod uses his blood for what we assume to be him giving them their powers.

CRITICAL COMMENTS

Brian Austin Green definitely shows a lot of depth to his character, here showing him in a more sympathetic light. In the end he’s the hero, which is a big change from the guy we saw in the season premiere. It felt sad to see all the stuff happening to Corben.

All the main cast members also do their usual good jobs, though Tess only seems to appear midway through the episode.

When it came to writing, that’s where the episode suffered. There were a decent chunk of things that don’t make sense and for a longtime viewer such as myself, I’m able to point them out quite easily. Direction was well done, but it’s still in the shadow of an episode like Checkmate.

RATING: 7/10